After a certain amount of time, almost every relationship hits a rocky patch. Feelings get fiery, opinions are in conflict, and hearts can get broken. However, these disputes between lovers can often be resolved through reminders and reassurance.
Here are six affirmations to help you fix your relationship:
- “We are a team.”
- “Do not let the sun go down on anger.”
- “Trust is key.”
- “People can always change.”
- “Relationships aren’t 50/50.”
- “It is better to be kind than to be right.”
If you are experiencing relationship turmoil, fear not – there is always hope. Read on to learn more about potential relationship-saving affirmations that you can incorporate into your life.
“We are a team.”
This affirmation is helpful for couples who are struggling to balance their mutual desires. These desires can be sensual, romantic, career-oriented, or simple matters of personal taste. Even with the most successful and compatible couples, conflict can arise when two people have different opinions.
One of the most crucial aspects of developing a relationship with someone is developing a “team mindset.” A team mindset is a way of thinking that turns you and your partner into a working unit. Instead of prioritizing your own wants or needs, you think of what will be mutually beneficial for both of you.
To step into the team mindset, it is important to be honest about what you want. Be compassionate, but also be truthful. Your partner needs to understand your desires as much as you need to understand theirs. If it is helpful, make visual lists of what both of you want out of your relationship, and compare what desires may be dealbreakers and what desires can be compromised.
“Do not let the sun go down on anger.”
This affirmation is a great choice if you and your lover have been arguing for what feels like days at a time. If you have ever asked a successful couple that has been together for multiple decades what their secret is, they will likely tell you that they never go to bed angry.
When you go to sleep before resolving an argument, you and your partner are indicating to one another that your priorities are not with the relationship but rather with avoiding being inconvenienced. Going to bed angry is also a great way to have a terrible night’s sleep, which will only make you grouchier in the morning.
As an alternative to going to bed angry, first see if you can resolve the argument. It’s important to be compassionate and do your best to understand the other person’s point of view. If you are having a hard time concluding your argument, see if you can find some temporary common ground. This way, you are not going to bed as angry as you would have before – just get up early together to wrap up your thoughts and clear your heads.
“Trust is key.”
This affirmation is the right one for you if you are having a hard time developing trust in your partner, or vice versa. What is more important to your relationship: passion or trust? This question can be a telling one, indicating a person’s priorities and maturity.
When you make passion your priority in a relationship, you may be forsaking your trust in the other person. But when you make trust your priority, you can be sure that you are both staying faithful and honest to one another.
One great way to establish more trust in a relationship is to be open to hearing the other person’s thoughts. When someone wants to express their feelings, but you get upset and shut them down, the other person will be hesitant to be truthful with you in the future. Open your ears to your partner’s wants and needs and keep trust in mind always.
“People can always change.”
This affirmation is best if you are frustrated by a habit or behavior of your partner’s. You can be almost certain that the person your partner was five years ago is not the same person they are now. They were likely more naïve and knew less about their profession and hobbies.
The same goes for you – you are highly likely to be more mature and perhaps more educated. When you think about the kind of person someone was in their past, keep in mind any changes they may have experienced.
Change is a tricky topic when it comes to relationships. While some behaviors such as infidelity can often arise in patterns, other behaviors are subject to change and improvement. Say your partner is horrible at doing the dishes. They leave dirty plates everywhere, and they do not empty the dishwasher.
Is this a dealbreaker for you, or can you have a loving conversation about their behavior that does not demean them? When you have loving conversations with your partner, you are stepping away from the need to “change them,” and you can hold space for their individuality while still wanting the best for the both of you.
“Relationships aren’t 50/50.”
This is the affirmation for you if you are feeling unsure how much effort to put into a relationship. Before you get confused about this affirmation, hear me out. Relationships should not be a 50/50 split, with each person giving half of themselves to each other. This is because relationships should be 100/100 – each person offers the relationship 100% of their efforts and their love.
Do not think of relationships as two people giving a little bit of their time to another person. Rather, both partners should be giving equal amounts of generosity and value to the relationship and not withholding their thoughts or feelings from the other person. While maintaining your individuality and independence, give your efforts to the other person so you can both grow and flourish.
“It is better to be kind than to be right.”
This is the perfect affirmation for couples who fight non-stop. Almost everyone has experienced the desire to be right in an argument. It is only natural that people want to succeed at what they are arguing in favor of. But often when someone is arguing and insisting that they are right, the other person comes out hurt.
You must draw a fine line between winning an argument and being compassionate towards the other person. Though it is tempting to always want to be right, remember that the other person in the relationship is someone that you love and that you have chosen to be with.
Instead of insisting on being right, be compassionate. Hear your partner out, speak your thoughts, but make sure that you are not trying to prove them wrong. Even if the argument does not come out in your favor, you expressed kindness towards them, which is really more important.
Remember that you are a team of two people working together for mutual benefit, and you are not just two strangers fighting. Do not go to sleep angry – take the time to work things out. Develop trust in one another, but also remember that people can change if they want to. Give 100% of your efforts for the benefit of the relationship and keep a kind attitude during arguments.
Remember that conflicts in relationships are normal and often easy to resolve. To alleviate some of your relationship fears, I have gathered these six affirmations that are sure to help you navigate rocky waters with your partner. I hope you are able to make peace and enjoy sunny days with your love.